Aloha Friday Message – March 7, 2008 – part 1


Happy Aloha Friday, Part 1

Crucita and I will soon be celebrating wedding anniversary number thirty-nine. In my mind, I know that is a long time, but in my heart it is just a fleeting moment compared to the eternity we expect to share together. Scripture tells us that in Heaven men and women neither marry nor are given in marriage, so sometimes I wonder how we will relate to one another when we get there. I suspect we will be so filled with joy that all previous relationship will be seen as precursors to that joy; a foretaste, if you will, of everlasting love – which of course is what we pledged to one another those thirty-nine years ago.

I was thinking about that while I was packing our lunches, and recalled that our friends who we so close to us during our courtship had predicted that the marriage wouldn’t last six weeks. We are very, very different people, and they just couldn’t see how that could be reconciled. But there was as special chemistry between us, and that certainly has not changed. In fact, we’re close to being married 2029 weeks, about 339 times longer than they predicted!

So what about this chemistry? I thought about Chemistry 101 and subsequent course I took in preparation for my career in healthcare and recalled the definitions of MIXTURE, COMPOUND, AND ELEMENT. Now there are many kinds of each of those states, but I was specifically thinking of those definitions as they relate to marriage. [I’ll try to be brief, but this may end up being a two-parter – or more!]

I have mentioned before that I have enjoyed fulfilling the four basic roles in my life: Son, Brother, Husband, and Father. There are other roles to be sure but they are still somehow related to these four. For you ladies, of course, that would be Daughter, Sister, Wife, and Mother. Not all of us experience exactly those four roles and certainly not all of us experience them in exactly that order. Nonetheless, these are the roles I think of when I consider human relationships. In any of those roles you can also be servant; priest, prophet, and ruler; fixer or spoiler; and many, many others that are modifiers of those four basic roles. But Marriage is a life-changing experience that accounts for half of the basic roles: Spouse and Parent.

So: The chemistry. Some marriages are like compounds — A pure, macroscopically homogeneous substance consisting of atoms or ions of two or more different elements in definite proportions that cannot be separated by physical means. A compound usually has properties unlike those of its constituent elements. A compound constitutes a new and independent entity: A composite has components that may retain part of their identities: Putting that in terms that make a little more sense – a compound is something made of two or more ingredients so that when the compounding is complete a new physical state results. The ingredients cannot be mechanically separated.

Marriage can be like that. To all the world (“macroscopically”) the reality is no longer “I,” “you,” “me.” It is “We,” us.” Two become one flesh, one life, one compound that cannot be separated by physical means (even though they may be forced to live apart at times – as do our soldiers now). A marriage is a new and independent reality. A valid marriage is a permanent union of two uniquely different people and together they have a new set of characteristics.

What do you think happened next?

Well, I’m going to stop there and save some for next week, so watch for it. We’ll be in New York City, home of “that other” Picante Sauce (!), and then the next Friday, March 21, will be Good Friday. It is difficult for us to be away from our Parish and Friends at St. Catherine’s during Holy Week, but God is found everywhere. As they say, “Everywhere you go, there you are” – and so is He!

Do me a favor? Today, March 7, 2008, is the first day of the new moon, so you cannot see the moon in the sky, but next week beginning about March 10, you can see the “fingernail moon” a thin crescent, and it will proceed to a full moon by March 21 (just as Spring begins!). Look to the skies during that time and send us a little moonbeam once in a while. We might just make one of those serendipitous synchronous connections! March 7-14 the moon will be in the mid-morning sky. We leave on the night of the 14th. On March 21, we will be IN NYC with the kids and doubtless will be having a wonderful time. I’ll still send you something that day. And for the Moon Beams: Full moon progression will be in the mid-afternoon to early evening March 17-21. Meanwhile,

Whatever, whenever, wherever, whoever, however, if ever, and certainly forever— at your service.

See you in the moon!


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About Chick Todd

American Roman Catholic reared as a "Baptiterian" in Denver Colorado.

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